Who are you, and what do you want?

Who are you, and what do you really want?

Asking the right questions

I’m prone to something I call Shiny Things Syndrome, and I don’t always stop to fill in the finer details or ask myself why I want this thing in the first place. How will it serve me? Is it right for me? Am I choosing the right approach for my needs? Is this a five minute wonder? Does this thing really excite me and light me up? Do I want to do it for me, or for someone else?

Choosing wisely

I looked around at course and schools, and chose a coach trainer based on a personal recommendation. I’d do a lot more due diligence before making such a big decision again. I turned up to the course feeling rather uncertain, and not quite knowing what was going to happen. I found the trainer hard to gel with – I have no doubt that they’re an excellent coach but they weren’t a good fit for me. I came away from the course feeling under confident and not sure I was ready to be a coach.

Kissing frogs

This happened to me because I wasn’t clear on who I was and what I wanted. By this, I mean factors like my values and my character. What matters to me and what’s non negotiable. What I wanted to get from the experience, and what I wanted from the course and trainer. I went on to make exactly the same mistake a couple of years later!

I’m happy to say that after kissing a couple of frogs, I found and have done training with three fabulous individuals. Their values and teaching styles were a perfect fit for me, and I’m so pleased that I didn’t give up on my dream.

Learning what you want and need

I hope that hearing this story will help you in some way. If you want to dig deeper and find out who you really and what you want, I urge you to take the time and do it well. Once you have this figured out, it will help you to make really effective and congruent choices. The writer Brene Brown talks about a special ring she wears. When she’s presented with an opportunity, she takes time to spin the ring and ask herself if this opportunity is aligned with her values and goals. She doesn’t jump straight in. And yes, I bought a ring for myself after I read this. It helps me to pause and weigh things up carefully instead of jumping in feet first with no plan!